well, back to life, back to reality...
college is great, only one class, so easy. There are girls I know in same class are taking 4 classes.

My Creative Memories business is the focus, besides GOD and family. My goal is to have 6 people stay in Creative Memories with me. It's time for my daughters to jump in. Kandy, it's time for Ohio and your area to get your expertise on album making, will you please sign up? I don't even need to be there, you sign from my contract and send directly to CM company. In Feb, 2004 there are $80.00 in extra items you get brand new from CM. The new Tanzanite album, stickers for Spring & Easter and heart punches, lots of new stuff are given when you sign in FEb. This is your own business, and now that you are moved, you could have fun ordering, showing your albums to people at work, meet new neighbors. There are a lot of shy people in Creative Memories.

It looks like comments are not able to be posted so I will write just to read. Oh, I called Duane's brother Wayne to schedule a Creative Memories home-show and he will on Feb 12. I asked Duane when Shelly goes on a big scrapbook day and he said the same day he goes fishing, I said what date, he said the same day as he goes fishing. Anyway, Shelly may want to buy stuff b-4 that day. Jodi is buying from me, she even liked the $80.00 gifts.

Oh, just so you know, Sandra is going to sign up this month, and maybe even Wayne. So, I will keep focused and not bug you too much. NEXT...

Hi again,
I thought I would tell of two good stress-free parties I just gave last week. The first was my baby son's 20th birthday. He invited his siblings and ten of his friends. It really went well, Cosco cake and the pizzas you bake. Chef Philip put the bigger-than-our-oven pizzas, and baked four pizzas. I had the veggies, cut by Gramma, arranged on platters, dips, sodas. No one had to bring anything. We sat around, talking, laughing for a couple of hours, sang the birthday song. Tommy opened his presents and left with his friends to his real party.

Dad and I put away all the food, did the dishes. I watched t.v., dad went to bed. Oh, that was also the same day as Crytal's wedding shower at Dianna's. So that day went well with all that went on.

The next party was for my best friend, Ana's birthday on Jan. 15th. I decided since house was still clean to have a tea party for her and a few of her friends. The last tea party was for Karlene's shower, 4 yrs ago. Now some may not know that we live in a Victorian House of which I always wanted to have tea parties. This also went stressless, and pretty with flowers, balloons, two sandwich spreads that I made. We also had veggie trays, new ones (not leftover from Tommy's) a big tossed salad. I found and washed cruitts for oil and vinegar. My china was washed, dried, set on table the day ahead. The gold silverwear and crystal glasses cleaned and set on table. I asked Ana's two friends to come over, my mom. I picked Eucalyptus leaves, Cypress branches for center pieces.

It was beautiful, and Ana really was impressed. Especially since she already knew my sorry tale. This was a happy and organized party. I felt so pleased and proud of myself. Dad even helped buy the balloons, ice, and last minute things. I am very proud of him. I DID NOT YELL, GET ANXIOUS, or any other tactics that I used to do before parties, are you listening girls??

OK, so now I know I can be a success in my own home. Onto making those albums I have put off. College starts back on Tuesday Jan 20, 2004, from 7 - 9 pm.

I love you,
MOM

Hi Kandy & Karlene, etc,

Just read Kandy's Dish, & Karlene's and my blog. Well, since Thanksgiving was the beginning of the Holidays, and MLK Day is in Jan, her's whaz up.

I did some of the things I wrote about. One of my finals was on Dec 15, a project of 6 presentation boards. Ahh yes, I got to college late, but still turned in the boards, stayed there five extra hours glueing everything onto the foam core boards. The professor even left, his next class was NOT given a final, so I was on campus ALL BY MYSELF !!! Boy was that scary. But helpful, cuz I still turned the final in on the day it was due!

So, instead of Christmas being at Karlene's or Kristin's, our wonderful, thoughtful son, Philip, asked (begged, guilt tripped) me into having Christmas day at our house. It worked out okay, I still did NOT get down decorations except that was easily gotten. Here's the twist, cuz in our dysFUNtion, there is always a twist. My homeless brother called and said the abandoned house he was living in burned down. So, the almighty arrow prayer went up (without asking the king of this casle) asking my bro if he wants to come to my empty bedroom and single bed? Picture the look on Ralphie's face when he told his mom what he wanted for Christmas "Oooh!" look on my face.

Well dear bro called us from the local Greyhound station, and dear hubby went to pick him up. Now I told no child of mine that their crazy uncle was here. Soo, they (my kids) came couple by couple and talked nicely to uncle R. I treated him verrry nicely, considering we used to yell and scream at each other just 3 years ago, when our dad died. He stayed here for a week.

The twist is that I was told by my kids with grandkids that the grandkids could NOT come over while uncle R. was here. OK, now picture me getting a nervous breakdown with no outlet, no screaming, no fit (then). I got in my car and cried, sobbed to GOD, that I can't take it anymore. I can't pretend to BE NICE, when I really felt like committing a felony on someone. Then I go home, did not talk (who me, not talk?) R. said he loves me. I said I can't talk now & went upstairs. Hubby was ignoring me, mommy dearest was ignoring me, best friend was sick, other best friend had a wedding to plan, basically I was getting NO HELP FROM ANYONE.

My bro said he was going back to homeless haven out in the country (yes some parts of So Cal have country). Iwas relieved and knew GOD had heard me. OK then, you'd think all was fine here... NO, cuz no-one let me talk out my pent up feelings. So I had another mental break-down. Only this one was with screaming, yelling, getting out of the house, with a suitcase. Yeah, FIRST TIME IN MY MARRIED LIFE did I leave with a suitcase. I walked to a neighbor's to drive me to a motel with a Jacuzzi. I told the driver to tell my hubby where I was and to call me. Hubby called, I forgot to say I had driven off after we had dinner out (Rosebowl day) and he would not let me drive one mile from home. So I left him there, and drove home. He came home, of course, mad. He kicked over the heater. That's when I packed the bag to leave. So anyway, that's why he didn't want to come over to the motel. Click (phone hanging up).

While at the motel, two friends called, one I did not expect came over to visit to make sure I wasn't gonna hurt someone. I just wanted to relax. Here's a funny part, the motel room with Jacuzzi, I filled half with water. Then warmed up the room with heater, ahh a real heater. Was watching what I wanted on t.v., when I hear gurgle gurgle. the water was draining out of the Jacuzzi. I called "O" and said either get me another room, or a taxi. She came with a plug, but did not get inside the tub to see why it drained. I said "new room, (should have asked for free) now." Any way that is my sorry running away from home tale.

The next day (Jan 2) I called for psychiatric help, first available is Feb 18. I said I need help NOW. They said go to Emergency at hospital, so I had hubby drive me there. And he did. He still did not understand what was wrong with me. I told the nurse my sorry tale. And they asked if I wanted to hurt myself or another, I said no (I lied). Any way the Doc said I was overhelmed and overworked from the holidays. He gave me a tranquilizer, sent me home, made a follow-up appt on Mon Jan 5.

So now I went to 4 app'ts and found out I was depressed. What do they know? Anyway, I am getting help, WITHOUT DRUGS, just therepy and a book, Self Esteem in Ten Days. I already feel better. By the way, I was told I am doing the right things, going to college, losing weight, looking good for my age. I just needed SOMEONE TO LISTEN TO ME. Thank you, I knew I was NOT crazy!!!

GOD and prayer works faster than any drug! This week, I'm back to my cheerful self. Hubby and I went to a lovely wedding, I danced which makes me HAPPY. And then we had T.M.I after the wedding. OK, so maybe I could join a dance club? We are going on a Marriage Encounter weekend in Feb. (same date as Crytal's wedding, sorry my 33 yr marriage is more urgent).

I signed up for only one college 2-unit class. I am looking sooo forward to Bryan and Kristin's wedding, especially dancing!!! We will plan a trip to a state that has a vowell at the end, in August. Heads up Kip & Kandy. WE Will stay at a motel, with a rental car, only visit for a few hours in one place at a time. There is lots of relatives I want to see, so a reunion sounds good. Antiques and old houses sounds good, and good food. I will bring some of your favorite Mexican food.

That's enough T.M.I. for now.
See ya on the flip side!